Those who discover that a spouse has been unfaithful may not feel comfortable remaining in their marriage. The lack of trust they have and the sense of betrayal that develops can create fear and resentment.
Divorce may be the only way to move on after discovering adultery. The divorce process can be very complex and is often not as cathartic as those who feel wronged by their spouses might hope. People sometimes approach divorce with unrealistic expectations. Someone divorcing because of an unfaithful spouse may expect the courts to provide them with justice.
Divorce court does not always provide justice
Contrary to what people often expect, fault frequently has minimal impact on the outcome of divorce litigation. When New Jersey family law judges divide marital property, their focus is on an equitable or fair outcome. Usually, they determine what is equitable or fair without considering marital misconduct.
That may be slightly different in scenarios where one spouse initiates a fault-based divorce. Adultery is one of the potential grounds for divorce under state statutes, but people generally need compelling evidence to obtain a fault-based divorce. Even then, the courts are unlikely to use property division to penalize an unfaithful spouse.
That being said, the courts can take inappropriate financial conduct into consideration when dividing marital property and debts. If the cheating spouse spent thousands on vacations, gifts and motel stays to conduct an affair, their dissipation of marital funds could influence property division determinations. It may be possible to exclude debts related to adultery from the marital estate or ask a judge to factor in the wasteful misuse of marital income or assets while conducting an affair.
In scenarios where divorcing couples have prenuptial or postnuptial agreements, the terms within that document could also theoretically impose penalties for infidelity in some cases. Those hoping for justice during a divorce may need to go over their situation thoroughly to determine what recourse may be available to them.
Fighting for property division fairness while also focusing on the future, rather than the past, is often the best approach to a divorce triggered by infidelity. As the saying goes, living well is the best revenge. Those who focus on the future may ultimately feel more satisfied with the outcome of their divorce proceedings than those who set unrealistic expectations about punishing their spouses.