If you’re considering ending your marriage after the new year arrives, you’re not alone. In fact, so many people file for divorce in January that it’s sometimes referred to as “divorce month.”
A lot of this has to do with spouses in unhappy marriages deciding to take steps toward changing their lives in the new year. Many others – especially those with children or who are part of large families themselves – want everyone to enjoy one last holiday season together.
People debating whether or not to end their marriage often try to be practical about the decision – for example, creating a list of pros and cons. However, at least one study has found that people more often rely on their intuition and emotions when making big life decisions like divorce. There can be a dozen good practical reasons to stay in a marriage, that can override those – although those practicalities shouldn’t be ignored.
The issue of “recency bias”
Often, couples who are considering divorce decide to “see how things go” over the holidays before they make a final decision. However, whether you spend a romantic Christmas in Paris or you end up spending too much time together while you’re off work and fighting over everything, how the holidays go isn’t the best thing on which to base your decision to stay together or split. There’s something called “recency bias.” That’s “when we tend to overemphasize the importance of recent events when making decisions,” according to one psychologist.
Rather than focusing on a January divorce filing if things don’t improve over the holidays (or even if you’re just waiting for the holidays to be over), it can be best to give yourself some time in January once you return to your usual routine to determine what is best for you. That doesn’t mean you can’t start doing some preparation (like locating needed documents and thinking about what you want out of the divorce). It’s never too soon to seek out legal guidance to help with practical questions you might have and help you prepare – even if you ultimately don’t proceed with divorce.